I'm So Over It!

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Wow! It's been three whole months since I posted!

I did not know it had been that long.

Why have I been away?

I have been totally immersed in everything to do with the start-up of my business and I have totally neglected the weight loss efforts. I haven't even stepped on a scale because I knew - knew - I had gained even more weight.

I could guess what the numbers were and simply could not bring myself to stand there and get confirmation of my biggest fears.

I remember how miserably unhappy I was a year ago when I weighed in at a whopping 135!

My favorite jeans didn't fit right and my cute little sweaters were too tight.

Twelve months have passed and what I wouldn't give to see the 130s again! I never imagined my body would look like it does right now.

But last night I had a moment.

I looked in the mirror and I thought about all of the things that caused me to eat foods I shouldn't, cease to exercise, and neglect myself and my health in general and I just thought: I am so over it!

I'm over beating myself up about what I did and didn't do. I'm over being unhappy about how I look in my clothes. I'm over being uncomfortable in my skin and feeling like I'm walking around wearing a fat suit. I'm over wanting instant results. I'm over trying to be someone I'm not.

And for the first time since I talked about starting my weight loss journey, I believe I'm actually going to see some real results - because I'm done trying to lose the weight for superficial reasons and I finally addressed most of the issues that were at the heart of my weight gain.